A Love Letter to… Yourself?

Dear friends,

How are you doing? How are you feeling? Are you happy? Or could you be feeling happier? I think most of us fall into the latter category.

There aren’t many people in this world who would deny that it can be hard to love yourself. That is a universal problem that affects us all in some way, shape, or form, at some time or another. As hard as it is to handle, it’s also somewhat comforting to know we’re all learning that particular lesson.

You answered earlier (I’m assuming) that you could be happier. The goal of this blogpost is to help you find one way to achieve that!

Where the Love Letters Come In

Ok. Now I want you to take a minute and think about love letters. Think about your favorite kind of love letters. Maybe you like the idea of a high school couple passing notes in class. Perhaps the long distance letters from a soldier to his girl back home is more your style. You might prefer the heartfelt poetry and prose of the regency era. There are so many options! Today you’ll be writing your own.

Love letters have a reputation for being sweet, genuine, and thoughtful. Those are the ways people tend to express love for people that they truly care about.

Write a sweet, genuine, thoughtful letter to yourself including the things you like about yourself, the talents you have, gifts you bring, and anything uplifting, encouraging, and kind. (Because seriously, who doesn’t like to get compliments?)

Here are some questions you can ask yourself to get ideas:

• What is your favorite characteristic about yourself? Are you a good listener? Are you a loyal friend? Are you a good gift-giver? Are you creative? Good at connecting with others? Artistic? Dedicated? Athletic? Kind? Optimistic? Realistic? Driven? Musical? Compassionate? Honestly, this list could go on forever. Everyone has gifts. What are yours?

• What talents and skills do you have that you are proud of? Do you play an instrument? Are you good at a particular sport? Have you learned to cook a special meal? Are you good at planning events? Can you paint? Do you make people laugh? Again, the list could go on. What talents and skills do you have?

• What challenges have you overcome? (This one is huge. This letter to yourself isn’t supposed to pretend that you’re a perfect person. It’s supposed to help you recognize your worth and value in spite of the challenges that you’ve faced. Nobody – not one person – gets out of this life without challenges. That’s just how it works.) Have you battled with mental health? Are you still battling it? If so, congratulate yourself on not giving up. Have you struggled in school and worked to get better grades? Good job for the work you’ve put in! Be proud of yourself! Maybe you struggled to learn the skill you chose in the previous question. Woohoo! You kept at it and tried even though it was hard! What challenges have you had/do you have? Put those in the letter and tell yourself how proud you are of you.

A Tip

One tip I have is to write this as though you’re talking to a friend. I tend to talk to myself more harshly and judgmentally than I would ever speak to my friends. Most people do. Why do we do that? Growth, development, and love come from kind words, encouragement, and forgiveness. Not from harsh words and judgment. So write this letter to yourself, kindly, as a friend.

And shouldn’t you be your own friend since you have to spend ~quite literally~ all your time with yourself?

Here are some possible sentence starters if you need some inspiration:

Dear self,

• Thank you for being so _____.
• Your _____ betters the lives of your friends and family.
• I admire the way you _____.
• You are good at _____ and that helps the people around you.
• People love you for your _____.
• Your _____ talent brings light to the world.
• You have struggled with _____ but you are still working at it and I’m proud of you.
• You don’t let your struggles with _____ define you. You let them refine you.

And there are so many more possibilities! Take a moment to think about yourself, and then write a letter. Don’t overthink it, just write. Approach it thoughtfully and genuinely and you’ll be surprised and happy with what you come up with.

It may be cheesy, but I think this is such a good way to channel some self-love. We always think about the things we wish we could change, which isn’t healthy or helpful. This letter is to help you reflect on happier things, speak more kindly to yourself, and be your own friend. And because it’s a written letter, you’ll have it to keep and read in the future when you need a pick-me-up!

We all have good things to offer the world. Let this love letter to yourself remind you of that.

Good luck with your letter writing and I hope this brightens your day and future days.

Sincerely,

Kayla